Beauty For Ashes

Isaiah 61:1-3

^1" The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me,
for the Lord has anointed me
to bring good news to the poor.
He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted
and to proclaim that captives will be released
and prisoners will be freed.
² He has sent me to tell those who mourn
that the time of the Lord’s favor has come,
and with it, the day of God’s anger against their enemies.
³ To all who mourn in Israel,
he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,
a joyous blessing instead of mourning,
festive praise instead of despair.
In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks
that the Lord has planted for his own glory."

I have had this scripture in my head for a few days now. As a lot of you know my cousin Amanda and her husband Brian lost their baby boy Gabriel Elliot on Monday. I was blessed with the chance to go see them in the hospital and hold their precious little boy. He looked so handsome and had the softest hair. I couldn't stop touching it, or kissing him. It was a bittersweet visit. I took some pictures, but I'm not going to post them or give details of his birth. Those belong to Amanda and Brian and I wouldn't want to post either without their permission. But I can tell you that they were able to spend some time with him before he went home to the Lord. I know they were thankful for that time, even though I'm sure it didn't feel like enough.

When my aunt told me about how sad his sister was when they had to say goodbye, I just couldn't stop thinking about how it isn't fair for a five year to know this kind of sorrow. But then this scripture popped in my head, specifically the part about giving them a crown of beauty for ashes. I was washed over with a peace and confidence that God is going to bring something beautiful out of this tragedy. It may take a while to see it, because losing a child has got to be one of the hardest storms to weather. It isn't something that you will ever "get over" but I know that they will continue to live their lives serving and loving their God. I've already witnessed Amanda and Brian living out the verse " In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory." I know they are beyond devastated and heartbroken, but they are living out their faith and showing everyone the power of God's peace. There was so much peace in that hospital room, even while they were grieving. They believe, as I do, that this world is not the end. They will see their little boy, along with his brother Felix, in heaven one day.

I will continue to pray for them and their three living children. While they have a strong faith, they aren't super hero's, and there are sure to be tough days ahead. They have a lot of family and friends lifting them up in prayer, I just wish we didn't have to. But that's a whole different post and debate about why God allows babies to die. The bottom line is: I don't know and I probably won't know until I get to heaven and ask Him. But I do know that He will bring something beautiful from Gabe's life. He's already touched my life, and making me seek out God's word and truth more.

I put some songs on my blog that have really touched me lately. I wouldn't be a true member of the Jenkins family if music didn't speak to me. The first one has a verse from Isaiah 61. It's one that I use to listen to in college. The second one is by Natalie Grant and I have to warn you that even though this song has been on the radio for a while now, I have yet to listen to it without crying. Grace calls it the sad song. It gives me hope and makes me sad at the same time. The third one really drives home a fact that I've been realizing lately. That even after walking with the Lord for almost eighteen years, I have only reached the tip of the ice burg in my knowledge and understanding of God and His holiness. He is a big God, and His ways are not always my ways. But in the end His way will lead me in the best direction.

Wow!! I can't believe my deep thoughts tonight. But these are things that have been going through my mind for a few weeks now. I'll stop writing, but I think I would like to share more of my thoughts with you all. Please pray for Amanda and Brian and their family. They are awesome people and I know they would appreciate your prayers.